Posted by Today is May 30, three weeks after Mother’s Day was celebrated in India. However, this little vignette was initially written two months ago as a submission to an international website. It wasn’t selected for publication, so I was keen to share it here but with one thing and another, I just didn’t get time to do it before today. Mother’s Day this year – my first with my second child – was extra special because I spent it on a ladies trip to Goa with my mom, aunt, cousin and daughter. All we did while there was shop to our heart’s content and eat delicious food. It was the best celebration and the best way to take our minds off all the chaos in the world – wars, political crises, the rise of AI et al.
Anyway, here is my little vignette – a Mother’s Day tribute. Do let me know what you think of it in the comments section below:
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We Will Always Have Harry Potter
By Noor Anand Chawla
Much of who I am as a wife, sister, daughter-in-law, and mother is shaped by the influence of my own mother. When I was expecting my second child after a gap of 8.5 years, my mother sought to prepare me for the emotional tumult of parenting two children.
She reminded me of the jealousy I developed when my brother was born a few years after me; of the sense of competition that pervaded our sibling relationship for most of our growing years; and how she often acted as a buffer between us to quell heightened emotions. To counter these issues, she advised me to build individual relationships with both my children.
So, when I grappled with frustration and mom guilt at being called upon to simultaneously address the vastly differing needs of my children – one a sensitive and shy pre-teen and the other a boisterous and demanding newborn – I took a card from my mother’s book.
With breastfeeding taking up large chunks of my time, I decided on a sedentary activity – reading the entire Harry Potter series to my son while nursing the babe. We bonded over the relatable characters, magical mayhem, delightful plot twists, and enduring friendships the series had to offer, and I understood my mother’s advice on maintaining individual relationships with kids. In time perhaps, my daughter will develop interests that align with mine, but I know that my son and I will always have Harry Potter.
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This blog post is part of ‘Blogaberry Dazzle’ hosted by Cindy D’Silva and Noor Anand Chawla in collaboration with Mister Tikku.
This post is part of the Bookish League blog hop hosted by Bohemian Bibliophile.
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*This is not a sponsored post.
**Copyright in pictures and content belongs to nooranandchawla.com and cannot be republished or repurposed without express permission of the author. As I am a copyright lawyer by profession, infringement of any kind will invite strict legal action.
I think your Mother gave you some sound advice.It is natural for children to feel insecure and jealous when a competitor arrives and is showered with so much attention. Finding common ground to bond over is an excellent idea.
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Such a heartfelt message beautifully wrapped in just a few words. It truly touched me. Thank you for sharing such a valuable life lesson about nurturing individual relationships with children.
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Good to hear that you had retail therapy on your all-ladies trip. I feel they are the best holidays..What a brilliant way to bond with both kids, Noor. Your son must be fascinated with Harry Potter, while your daughter must be taking it all in while nursing.
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What a heartwarming tribute! The way you intertwined cherished family moments with the magic of Harry Potter was truly touching. Your mother’s wisdom about nurturing individual bonds with each child can only come from the experience of someone who has been through it. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful piece!
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Your mum’s right. While keeping the two kids from harming each other (sibling fights are normal), I have separate outings with just them OR just my son OR just my daughter. They love the times when I’m only with each one of them. And both genders will connect on different levels. It’s fun! All the best!
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Loved this, Noor. That moment where you’re reading Harry Potter to Fateh while nursing your daughter really stood out, not just as a snapshot of motherhood, but as a reminder of how stories shape our earliest memories. There’s something quietly magical about passing down a book that’s meant so much to us, especially when life is moving at full speed. You’ve captured that feeling without overexplaining it, and it really landed.
Thank you!
Such a great tribute to read about. I can also relate with the jealousy you’re talking about. I think sibling jealousy is quite normal especially with the gap is too much. Getting used to being the apple of the eye of parents then suddenly having someone to share with the attention can be quite an experience for a young ones heart. I may not be a Potter-head myself but I’m glad you had that outlet and bonding moment to treasure!
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Being the younger sister my didi always complains how she was the one who had to be a playgroup way early because I was been taken care of, but at the same time she loves me the most in the whole world. I feel jealousy and temper comes and goes but the bond stays. And like your harry potter I feel every relationship had the one memory one connection that helps them stay intact for lifetime!
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In my house, we are all old, yet I see my mother playing the peace game all the time. We do tend to get possessive of our things and parents also. Your mother has given you good advice and I hope you have a great relationship with your children and there’s Harry Potter magic keeping you all in this great family bond.
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We always will have Harry Potter! I just loved the title. Nothing else could have been better.
We indeed bond with our parents on different things. I am glad that happened in our family as well.
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Great way of bonding . This is such a precious tip for young mothers when they have their second
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I can resonate how babies will react having their siblings having lived in a joint family and having three siblings of my own. But you will grow out of it and your mom’s advice will guide you through
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We are two sisters, and I truly understand how as an elder one, you feel left out and unloved 🙂 But your mom gave such sound advice and I’m glad she prepared you well. Harry Potter is such a lovely choice to read to your first born 🙂
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For me every day is Mother’s day and yes what I am today a king size role played by my mom and I cant never forget that. But for the first time I managed to celebrate it with her this mother’s day and when I hugged her and gave a cake and Noor you will not imagine what a vibrant smile was on her face… I love you Ma. Its Priceless for me and rememebering it also I am having tears in my eyes while writing it.
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I faced this too. My elder felt insecure while the younger too most of my time. Thanks God, I had my mother with me for a good 3 months. That help me get off some time with the elder and spend some time., that I woudnt forget
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Wow! That was a well written personal experience. Moms always know what’s right and the pieces of advice that they give are always gems!
Thank you!
A lovely tribute, Noor. Kids do tend to feel jealous of sorts when there is a new baby. Books are such a fantastic way to bond. Nothing like the magic of Harry Potter.
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This is exactly the same way my daughter and I bond. They’re born four years apart and this is what keeps us all grounded. An activity for wch of them
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Your mother gave you great advice. It is necessary to build individual relationships with them. My son was the most excited when my daughter was born. The older one needs to feel important and loved when there is a new baby.
Thank you… So glad to see you back in action!
I can totally relate. Although my elder one was only four and half, the insecurity never ends, no matter how much we try. PS my elder one is a total Potterhead!
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This was such a heartwarming read, Noor. I loved how you turned a challenging phase into something so meaningful with your son. That Harry Potter connection is truly special. I’m still trying to figure out how to balance things with my tween and teen 😄
Good luck! And share tips once you’ve figured it out!
What a beautiful note to mother, I felt relatable and my heart get warmed
Thanks
Harry Potter is not The Boy Who Saved You? Haha. Jokes apart, motherhood with two kids isn’t easy. You’re doing a splendid job that’ll hopefully inspire both your kids.
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older siblings do get jealous of all the attention that a newborn demands, your mother was very wise to give you some solid advice. I really liked the bit about you reading Harry Potter with your son. It makes it so special!
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What can be more sacred than a mother-child relationship? You were fortunate to have a mother who had time and patience, and above all tenderness, to care… Your children have been fortunate too. May this post bring such tenderness into a few more hearts… (This is no insinuation that too many women are heartless.)
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It’s so wonderful you got to do a girls trip – those are the best because the way they pamper you, very few people can 🙂 And I love the fact that you get to share Harry Potter with your son. I have dreams of doing that with at least one of my niece/nephew!
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That’s great advice from your mom. I had a bit of a struggle with my twins too but I instinctively did the same with them – going out on solo dates with them, crafting with my daughter, watching a film with my son – it seems to have worked out fine.
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That sounds like sound advice from your mom! My sister and I have a 7.5 year gap, and looking back, I know it can’t have been easy for my mom. But she did her best, and I can see you’re doing a fine job with your kids, too!
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I am glad you are enjoying this journey, and Harry Potter is a wonderful companion to uplift you in times of emotional need.
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Beautifully captured the essence of the mother’s wisdom about building individual relationships with each child, and how the Harry Potter reading sessions became a special, enduring bond between you and your son during a challenging time of adjusting to life with two children.
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For your mother to have the approach of individual relationship with you and your brother in her time was something way ahead of her times. Hats off to her and now you on a similar path. :-)
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As a child-free adult who has been an only child to her parents, I learned about a different perspective – sibling rivalry – from this post.
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